I am Keith. Everything around me is the world. It's not just below my feet. I'm talking the whole of existence here. That's the world. It's a lot bigger than me. It's a lot bigger than you and everybody else.
That's why it's around me and not the other way around. So...I'll show you the world around me, how I see it.
Norwegian: Velkommen! Me: Hei! Norwegian: Snakker du norsk? Me: Ja, litt…”Luftputebåten min er full av ål.” Norwegian: Hahahahahaha!!! Hvordan har du det? Me: Bare bra, takk! Norwegian: Hva heter du? Me: Jeg heter Keith. Norwegian: Hvor er du fra? Me: Jeg er fra Dallas, Texas. Norwegian: Hyggelig å møte deg, Keith! Me: Artig å treffe deg! Norwegian: Skal vi danse? Me: ??? Norwegian: Jeg elsker deg, Keith! Me: ??? La meg være alene!!! Norwegian: Ha det bra. Me: Ha en fin dag, weirdo!
Environmentally friendly Vegan:
You know, I'm vegan, and I only eat locally grown organic produce because it is better for the environment.
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Misanthropic Natalie Dee:
Oh, yeah! The environment! I started eating people... Every kill is a carbon footprint gone forever! One less car, one less mouth to feed, everyone wins! You need an extra freezer to store the remains, but it is a small price to pay for good meat that is beneficial to the world. Plus, every time I butcher some motherfucker, that is one less motherfucker that is going to be driving erratically in front of me when I am trying to go to Nordstrom.
